The Hunger That Wasn't Real

Raghav could not sleep. He could not eat. He could not sit still.

Every moment, something pulled at him: a hunger food could not fill, a thirst water could not quench, a restlessness movement could not satisfy.

“Swamy,” he begged, “I am drowning in wanting. How do I make it stop?”

Swamy placed three bowls before him.

 “Fill them with what each needs.”

Raghav stared. “But they ALL are identical.”

“So are your desires,” Swamy said, “when you do not look carefully.”

That night, Raghav sat with his discomfort. For the first time, he did not run from it. He breathed. He waited. He listened.

The next morning, he poured rice into the first bowl. Water into the second. The third remained empty.

“Why?” asked Swamy.

“Because I was not hungry. I was not thirsty. I was lonely. I was afraid. I was running from myself.”

Swamy nodded. “And now?”

“Now I ask each feeling its name before I feed it.”

Months passed. Raghav still felt desire, but he no longer obeyed every knock at the door. Some guests were real. Some were shadows.

One evening, Swamy asked, “How do you rid yourself of unnecessary desires?”

Raghav smiled. “I do not. I simply stop preparing a feast for every ghost that calls itself hunger.”

Swamy struck the floor once.

Moral: 

Not every longing is a need. Learn to tell the difference, and you will stop starving while standing in front of a full table.

One Honest Question

Arjun, a 34-year-old stockbroker, looked successful from the outside. But inside, he was tired and disappointed. For years, one thought kept troubling him: “If I’m not a Senior Partner by now, I’m a failure.”

When a younger colleague got promoted, something inside Arjun broke. He smiled at the office, but every congratulations felt like a jab. Slowly, he became bitter. He blamed his boss, avoided difficult work, delayed important reports, and stopped believing in himself.

Finally, Arjun decided to meet a psychologist for counselling.

During one session, she gently asked him, “Arjun, if nobody was watching you or judging you, what would you do next?”

He became silent.

For the first time, he had no excuse.

With tears in his eyes, he said, “I would start working on the portfolio I’ve been avoiding because I’m scared I might fail.”

That one honest answer changed something.

Through counselling, Arjun slowly understood that his biggest enemy was not his colleague or his boss. It was the harsh voice inside him that kept saying, “You are not good enough.”

He started taking small steps. He opened the report he had avoided. He asked for honest feedback. He even sincerely congratulated his younger colleague.

Nothing magical happened overnight. But Arjun felt lighter.

He realised his value was not decided by a job title. Every small step forward proved he was growing.

Moral: 

Sometimes we waste our energy protecting our ego and avoiding failure. Life changes when we stop asking, “Why am I not good enough?” and start asking, “What small step can I take today?” Arjun discovered that the workable action was always available. It was just buried under the weight of his expectation that demanded a different reality from the truth

The Invisible Shield

Ayesha Begum, a psychologist, led a group for people struggling with anger and anxiety. Among them was Sameer Khan, a sharp-witted software manager known for his fiery temper. Sameer had been sent to therapy after insulting a colleague during a meeting, leaving everyone hurt and tense. 

He always said, 

“I’m not the problem ...people just can’t handle the truth.”

Ayesha saw that Sameer’s anger was a mask. So, one day, she brought a clear sheet and gave Sameer sticky notes. “Write your thoughts during your last argument,” she said gently. Sameer scribbled:

• “They want me to fail.”
• “If I’m not tough, they’ll walk over me.”
• “I have to win or die.”

Ayesha asked him to stick these on the clear sheet in front of him. Then, she invited Rehana, a quiet team member, to act like the colleague who’d doubted Sameer & asked him questions like Socrates. As Rehana spoke, Sameer looked at his notes, his “invisible shield.” 

Ayesha whispered, “Just observe, don’t react.”

Sameer paused. For the first time, he responded calmly: “I understand your point. Let’s look at the data together.” The group was stunned.

Afterwards, Sameer admitted, “I act tough because I’m scared to look weak.”

Moral:

Sometimes, anger hides our deepest fears. When we pause and look at our thoughts, we can choose kindness over aggression. True strength is in understanding, not fighting.

The One Tiny Habit That Changed a Life

Long before Satya Nadella became CEO of Microsoft, he was a young engineer from Hyderabad carrying something far more important than a powerful title: 

the willingness to keep learning.

He joined Microsoft in 1992. No one could have guaranteed he would someday lead the company. Only work to do, problems to solve, people to understand and another opportunity to grow.

So instead of obsessing over how far he had to travel, he kept moving forward.

One lesson. One problem. One conversation at a time.

Years passed.

The young engineer became a leader. But success did not make learning less important; it made it essential.

Nadella eventually championed a powerful cultural shift at Microsoft: 

moving from being “know-it-alls” to “learn-it-alls.”

Behind that idea is a lesson bigger than business.

You don't transform your life in one spectacular morning.

You transform it on ordinary mornings when nobody is watching.

One page read.

One skill practiced.

One mistake understood.

One difficult conversation handled with empathy.

One more attempt after failure.

Individually, these moments can feel insignificant. Repeated for years, they can change the direction of a life.

In 2014, more than two decades after joining Microsoft, Satya Nadella became its CEO.

The destination looked extraordinary.

But the journey was built through countless ordinary steps.

Moral: Never underestimate a small action repeated with purpose. Your dream may feel impossibly far away today but you don't have to reach it today.

You only have to take the next step.

Think big. Start small. Keep going.

Story of the Yogi & the Secret of - Who am I ?

Long ago, a curious boy visited a kind yogi who sat beneath a big tree.

The boy asked,
" Guru Ji , my eyes see, my mind thinks, my heart says, 'I am me.' I make choices, and I remember things. Which part of me is truly who I am?"

The yogi smiled and asked,
"Who is asking this question?"

The boy thought for a moment and said,
"Maybe it is the part that chooses right from wrong."

The yogi replied,
"That part only helps you make decisions. It is not truly you."

The boy asked,
"Maybe it is the part that thinks, 'I am me.'"

The yogi shook his head.
"That part only creates the idea of yourself. It is not truly you."

The boy asked,
"Is it my mind that arranges my thoughts?"

The yogi said,
"That part only organises your thoughts. It is not truly you."

The boy wondered,
"Maybe it is the part that remembers everything?"

The yogi smiled and said,
"That part only stores your memories. It is not truly you."

The boy became quiet and asked,
"If I am not any of these things, then who am I?"

The yogi smiled and pointed toward the vast blue sky.

He said,
"Your eyes, ears, and feelings are like clouds. Your mind is like the wind. The voice that says 'I am' is like thunder. The part that decides is like lightning. Your memories are like rain."

But you are like the sky.

The sky is always present, even when clouds, wind, rain, thunder, and lightning appear and disappear. They come and go, but the sky remains unchanged.

That is your true self."

The boy asked,
"Why do I have all these parts then?"

The yogi smiled.

He said,
"So that, after searching everywhere, you discover that you were always the sky. You were always at home within yourself."

Moral of the Story

You are not just your thoughts, feelings, or memories.

You are like the sky, always present even when clouds come and go.

Remember: your true self is always peaceful and free, just like the sky.

Your memories are not you.

You are not what comes and goes. You are what always remains.

Find that. AND

This is the secret 

Kiranjit Ahluwalia was an Indian woman living in the UK ...

 Lakshmi’s [ changed name for our blog ] story was not about a villain or a hero. It was about a woman who suffered silently for Tooo MANY YEARS

Behind her smiling face was a heart full of pain. Her marriage, which was supposed to bring happiness, became a place of fear. She carried wounds on her body and inside her heart. Whenever people asked about her injuries, she quietly said, “I fell.” She learned to hide her tears because society told her to be patient and adjust.

Her husband’s anger took away more than her happiness. It even caused the loss of her unborn child. Still, her family, the police, and the people around her told her to stay silent.

Lakshmi’s only hope was her son, Aarav. But Aarav loved his father and believed his mother caused the problems at home. Lakshmi felt completely alone.

One night, when she feared she would not survive, she reacted in desperation. Her action brought her to prison, but there she met Dr. Sharma, who listened to her story with kindness instead of judgment.

During the trial, the truth about Lakshmi’s life came out. People saw the pain hidden behind years of silence. She was punished for her crime, but she also received help and therapy. Slowly, she rebuilt her life and repaired her bond with her son.

Today, Lakshmi helps other survivors find courage and hope.

Moral: 

Every person has a story we may not see. Before judging someone, we should try to understand their pain. True justice is not only about punishment; it is also about healing, compassion, and giving people a chance to change. Sometimes, the strongest people are those who find the courage to speak after years of silence.

-------------------------------------------

NOTE :

The Real Case: Kiranjit Ahluwalia
Kiranjit Ahluwalia was an Indian woman living in the UK. After suffering years of severe domestic abuse, she set fire to her husband’s bed in 1989. He died ten days later. Kiranjit was first convicted of murder and sent to prison for life.

Her case became famous for introducing the “battered woman syndrome” defence in court. After support from activists, her conviction was overturned in 1992. The court accepted that she acted because of the prolonged abuse she had suffered, recognizing her mental state was affected by years of violence and lack of support.

🇮🇳 Indian Legal Context: Manju Lakra v. State of Assam
In India, Manju Lakra v. State of Assam (2013) was the first case to discuss Battered Woman Syndrome (BWS) as a defence. The court recognized that years of abuse can change a woman’s mental state and that “sustained provocation” can be a valid legal argument. This principle is important for understanding cases like the fictional Lakshmi in my story.

The Stone That Changed his Life

For years, Dr Maya had sat across from countless people, listening to their silent battles, their broken dreams, hidden fears, and the courage they carried despite their struggles. She knew that sometimes the heaviest burdens were the ones people carried inside their own minds.

One rainy afternoon, a young man named Arjun walked into her office. His head was lowered, his hands trembled slightly, and his eyes carried the weight of disappointment.

“I keep failing my job interviews,” he whispered. “I prepare, I try, but I always feel like I’m not enough. Everyone else seems smarter and more confident than me.”

Dr. Maya listened without interrupting. She saw not a failure sitting before her, but someone who had forgotten his own worth.

After a moment, she picked up a small, ordinary stone from her desk and placed it in Arjun’s hand.

“Take this stone home,” she said. 

“Every night, write down one thing you did well that day. It can be something small. Place the note under this stone and remind yourself that your efforts matter.”

Arjun was unsure, but he agreed.

Days turned into weeks. Slowly, the empty pages filled with victories he had once ignored.

• “Practised for my interview.”

• “Helped someone today.”

• “Had the courage to try again.”

A month later, Arjun returned. The same stone rested in his hand, but the hopeless young man was gone. His shoulders were straight, his eyes were brighter, and his smile carried confidence.

“I got a job offer,” he said. “But more importantly, I finally realised I was never as incapable as I believed.”

Dr. Maya smiled. “We often become prisoners of our mistakes and forget the strength hidden in our efforts. Confidence grows when we learn to recognize our own progress.”

Arjun looked at the stone and understood that it was never the stone that changed his lif it was the belief he discovered within himself.

Moral: 

The greatest transformation begins when we stop measuring ourselves by our failures and start recognising the courage, effort, and strength we already possess.

Using AT to Manage Exam Anxiety

Client: Priya, 21-year-old undergraduate student

Presenting problem: Examination stress and anxiety

Priya was a 21-year-old college student preparing for her final examinations. She experienced intense anxiety whenever exams approached. She reported symptoms such as increased heartbeat, muscle tension, difficulty sleeping, poor concentration, and repeated thoughts like “I will fail” and “I cannot handle this pressure.”

Because her physical stress reactions were affecting her academic performance, she was introduced to Autogenic Training (AT), a relaxation technique developed by Johannes Heinrich Schultz. The goal was to help her develop self-regulation skills and learn to manage her stress response.

Assessment and Preparation

Initially, Priya received psychoeducation about the interplay between psychological stress and physiological responses. She learned that anxiety often manifests as increased muscle tension, rapid breathing, and heightened cardiac activity. It was clarified that autogenic training relies on passive concentration and autosuggestion, rather than forced relaxation, to elicit a state of calm.

Priya was instructed to practice AT daily for 5–10 minutes, ideally in a quiet environment, maintaining a comfortable and relaxed sitting posture to facilitate maximum benefit.

Autogenic Training Intervention

1. Heaviness Exercise

Priya closed her eyes and repeated the phrase silently:

“My arms and legs are heavy.”

She was encouraged to focus her attention on the sensation of heaviness and bodily relaxation, which contributed to a measurable reduction in muscle tension associated with anxiety.

2. Warmth Exercise

Next, she repeated:

“My arms and legs are warm.”

She concentrated on the feelings of warmth and comfort, facilitating a transition into a physiologically calmer state.

3. Breathing Exercise

Priya practiced the suggestion:

“My breathing is calm and regular.”

She learned to observe and allow her breathing to become slow and regular, rather than attempting to control it consciously.

4. Heart Exercise

She practiced:

“My heartbeat is calm and steady.”

When Priya noticed that focusing on her heartbeat exacerbated her anxiety, she was advised to temporarily omit the heart exercise and redirect her attention to the breathing exercise until she felt more comfortable.

5. Abdominal Warmth Exercise

She repeated:

“My abdomen is warm and relaxed.”

This suggestion supported deeper physical relaxation and enhanced her sense of bodily comfort.

6. Forehead Cooling Exercise

Finally, she practiced:

“My forehead is pleasantly cool.”

This exercise promoted a sensation of mental clarity and emotional calm.

Cancellation Procedure

Upon completion of the relaxation exercises, Priya was educated on the importance of the cancellation procedure, which enables a safe and gradual return to a state of normal alertness.

She followed these steps:

• Mentally said: “My arms are firm and strong.”
• Took a few deep breaths.
• Stretched her arms and shoulders.
• Slowly opened her eyes.
• Returned to normal activities.

The cancellation procedure helped Priya avoid post-session drowsiness or dissociation, supporting a smooth transition back to daily activities.

(When she used autogenic training at bedtime for sleep, cancellation was not performed because the aim was to continue into sleep.)

Application During Exam Situations

With consistent practice, Priya developed the ability to apply an abbreviated version of AT during acute stress, such as before mock exams or in the examination environment.

When she noticed anxiety, she:

1. Put her pen down briefly.
2. Took slow breaths.
3. Repeated:
4. • “My arms and legs are heavy and warm.”
   • “My breathing is calm and regular.”
   • “I am calm and focused.”
5. Used cancellation:
6. • “Arms firm. Breathe deeply. Open eyes.”
7. Returned attention to one question at a time.

Outcome

After four weeks of consistent practice, Priya reported significant improvements in her management of anxiety symptoms. She noted decreased muscle tension, improved sleep quality, and enhanced confidence prior to examinations. She gained a new sense of agency over her stress responses through the acquisition of relaxation and self-regulation skills.

Conclusion

This case illustrates the effectiveness of autogenic training as a self-regulation intervention for anxiety management. Through passive concentration, phrase-body association, regular practice, and appropriate cancellation techniques, individuals can develop greater control over physiological and psychological stress responses.

The Son Who Learned to Win Alone

Aryan was once a cheerful boy. His laughter filled the house. His drawings covered the fridge. But somewhere along the line, his father's words changed everything: "You have to be the best, Aryan. Second place is just the first loser.We, people, remember Usain Bolt's name, NOT the one who came 2nd after him "

At first, Aryan tried. 

He studied harder, 

trained longer, chased first place like oxygen. 

But soon, his world shrank. Every classmate became a rival. Every smile a threat. Every success was a personal failure.

One evening, after losing a debate competition, Aryan slammed the door. "They cheated. They always cheat." His father nodded. "That's politics, son. Trust no one. Crush them before they crush you."

The lessons took root. Aryan learned to argue, not to listen. To dominate, not to collaborate. To see people as obstacles, not allies.

But somewhere deep inside, a quiet truth remained:

"A person's worth is not a trophy to be won or a title to be protected. When you teach someone that they are valuable only when they succeed, they may spend their whole life trying to prove they deserve to exist."

Years passed. Aryan became a politician- successful, sharp, ruthless. He won every election. But he stood ALONE. No friends. No warmth. No one to call at midnight. His father watched his son's speeches on television ...polished, powerful, hollow and finally understood.

I taught him to win. But I never taught him to love.

Moral: When you teach your son that life is a political battlefield, you teach him hatred, antagonism, and hostility. You teach him that everyone is an enemy. He may win every race but he will lose the only thing that matters. True victory is not defeating others. It is standing with them.

Be a lighthouse, not a general. The heart cannot be conquered, only welcomed.

The MAN for Whom Nothing Was Ever Enough

Ramu had just one son. People always said, "One son is enough." But they also said, "A son must provide." Arjun, his only boy, used to laugh like thunder. Now, when he called, his voice shook. His wife's parents kept asking for a better car, a bigger house, a fancier life. He had two sons,a small government job but somehow, he was still "not enough."

Ramu gripped the phone so tight his hand ached. He wanted to march over and yell at the world, to defend his son with fire. But he knew anger burns you from the inside. He remembered how his cousin Vamshi used to call him "less than," and the old sting returned. Ramu didn't want Arjun to carry that pain.

So instead, Ramu simply asked, "When do you feel unafraid, beta?"

Silence. Then, softly: "When I play cricket. When I fix things. When I solve problems."

"Then start with those things, Arjun. Don't listen to the world. Start with what makes you feel alive."

Ramu invited Arjun home that weekend. No agenda. Just presence. They fixed a broken radio together. They sang old songs after dinner. Each moment chipped away at years of quiet hurt.

The world's demands and comparisons kept coming. But Ramu taught him to pause...to breathe, to choose. Arjun began saying, "Let me think about it," instead of "Yes, right away." He saw that fear was just a feeling, not a fact. His worth wasn't something others could decide. His story was his own to write.

Little by little, his son & grandsons also sang louder, imperfectly yet confidently. Arjun drew his own life lines. He even managed a shaky but firm "no" when the next demand came.

Seasons passed. Ramu's Tears turned into stories, and stories into laughter. The worldly demands didn't stop. But Arjun or his sons didn't crumble anymore. 

Moral: 

You can't always stop the storm. You can't make someone meet you halfway if they won't try. But you can stand beside your loved one, steady in the rain, until they realise they were never fragile. They were meant to weather the rough days.

If you can't be a bridge, at least be a lighthouse. Sometimes, you can't connect with everyone or solve every problem. But you can stand strong and shine, so that when they're ready, they know where to go.

Be a lighthouse, not a rescue boat. Only the ship can choose the shore.

Hurry kills presence. Read it backwards: Presence kills hurry.

The Fourth Daughter

Ramu had four daughters. People in the village called him unlucky. Ramu never agreed. To him, his daughters were blessings.

His youngest daughter, Meera, used to laugh and dance in the rain. But after marriage, she changed. Her in-laws kept asking for more 

- a scooter, gold, money. Even after giving birth to two sons, they still made her feel useless.

One evening, Meera came home and sat quietly near her father. Ramu saw fear on her face. He was angry, but shouting would not solve her pain.

So he asked gently, “Meera, when do you feel peaceful?”

She said, “When I am with my boys. When I cook. And when I sing.”

Ramu smiled. “Then begin there. Do more of what makes you feel like yourself.”

From that day, he stood by her without controlling her life. He listened. He reminded her that other people’s demands did not decide her value. Meera started with small things. She sang while cooking. She visited her father often. She spent time with her sons. Slowly, she learned to say, “No, I cannot do that.” without ANY HESITATION

Her in-laws did not change quickly. But Meera changed inside. She stopped believing every cruel word they said.

Months later, Ramu heard her laughing again.

He understood something important: sometimes we cannot fix someone’s life. But we can stand beside them until they find the courage to stand for themselves.

Moral: 

Support does not mean fighting every battle for someone. Sometimes, it means helping them remember their own strength.